Hash Trash

02/20/16 #032 Renegade Beer Fest Trail

The 32nd edition of the Renegade Hash House Harriers Columbus, hared by Dangerous Dismount and Battery Operated Boyfriend, began on a beautiful warm winter day out in the countryside of Johnstown. The locals were blessed with hashers from nearby Dayton H3: Jimmy Buffet and the Shit Stained Penis, Deep Swallows, Fido, Beamer (Bitch Moan Whine), and Goes Down on the Tip.

The trail started out with extremely soggy ground and lots and lots of mud. At the first BN we were graced with excellent stories on how our visitors earned their names. Shrimp was part of the story; but that’s all we will say. After all the beer was gone, we were off to the next BN.

The trail took us to our next BN stop which happened to be a horse farm, where the only swallows in the barn was Deep Swallows, who got to pet his first horse. The barn had many horses to keep us occupied while we were drinking the cold beverages. The boys decided to leave their mark in the horse stall. Some had never been in a horse barn, let alone had the opportunity to urinate in a stall (since every guy is hung like a horse, right??) They can now scratch that off their bucket list!!

To get to the SN stop, we crossed a muddy corn field, a small creek and headed deep into the woods. We passed a deer stand, to which two members apparently had “climb a deer stand in the middle of the woods”, on their bucket list. That is now scratched off the list, along with a full “moon” trail, to put it nicely.

The SN stop had a bottle of Fire Ball, in a camouflage flask; so fitting for our environment. The Fire Ball didn’t stand a chance with this group!! We also got to see a “show” with a squirrel and his nuts. Quite entertaining!!

We took off again looking for our 3rd BN stop. After running back thru the woods, B.O.B. was waiting for us with sleds and more beers. Even though there was no more snow left on the ground, the hill had plenty of wet leaves. A few half minds took to the hill and went flying down the on the saucer. After all the thrill seeking was done,we headed out of the woods. We traipsed thru another muddy cornfield back to the On-In.

Serialbater was the RA for the day, since our usual RA had other things to do that day (and should drink for it later). After the circle was done, we had excellent food provided by B.O.B. Thanks BOB!!

After dinner, the Renegade Beer Fest began. We sampled many types of beer and lots of shenanigans were the air that night. I would say we got to see A LOT of the Dayton << DELETED BY FACEBOOK>> that night, and us girls really appreciated that.

The shitty trail was over and the Beer Fest was a success, and all in attendance felt sorry for the other hashers who missed it. You should be ashamed of yourselves.

Godspeed your further trails,
Dangerous Dismount