Hash Trash

06/12/16 #042 – Rappelling Hillbilly Hash

Since I’m posting this a month late, I will start this tale a little earlier than a normal trash. There we were.

Cockpit and I did the unimaginable and arrived half an hour early to NFHN Robin’s house for the clown car down to Hocking Hills. It turned out to be a good thing since Cockpit’s GPS is too good for Route 33 and took us down some scary scenic roads, so we got there with just enough time for a potty break, to learn of Robin’s LOVE of insects especially the cicadas, and to find a Virgin before the hares arrived. I never did get Lady’s secret to getting Serial Bater there on time, but her black magic spell must have worked since he showed up as we were getting some bottles of water and snacks out of the trunk.

We had chalk talk by the art car belonging to Dancing Fool a travel hasher from…I can’t remember but he was on his way to Pittsburgh. It was very memorable, in that it had a sign saying it isn’t abandoned, and a license plate that said ‘I Recycle’. I am sorry I didn’t think to take any pictures of it, because it was a really cool car owned by a really cool hasher that cleaned trail as we went.

We finally were on out, and followed the road for a bit. As soon as we got in the woods we promptly got lost, until we looked back a bit from the check and found trail going the opposite way we had been trying to go. After some bushwhacking, where our Virgin bemoaned her lack of machete, we found a beer near! We enjoyed a sit, a beer and a bunch of water (it was HOT that day, who the hell was the RA…oh wait).

Trail resumed and we followed the river a ways. We came to a fork, where to the right looked like a path, but was actually completely scum covered water. Lady was nice to us and didn’t make us go through it too, so we went to the left and found a real path.

After another pleasant bit of hiking, we came upon a wild Member and some boulders we had to cross, so Lady warned us keep our hands free and BVFC! Cockpit didn’t listen and slid down a boulder with a loud crack scaring us but it was only him crushing his poor vessel not his person. After climbing 110 feet up (with some breaks along the way at least for me cause those hills kicked my ass!) we made it to the top and were rewarded with a GORGEOUS view and our final hare #2.

We took a break for more water and sandwiches to get ready for the rappelling part of the rappelling hash. Working Member and Lady Humps A Lot gave us a safety demonstration, and as the good hashers we are, we let the Virgin Sacrifice herself and go first. Bater was next over, as he had also done it before. I went next and had a blast! Cockpit managed to follow me over, even though Lady almost talked him out of it by trying to help him. Our Virgin, the adrenaline junkie, went again, as did Bater. NFHN Robin decided Just the Tip was enough for her and came back up. Dancing Fool was no fool and decided to stay welllll back from the edge. Our Virgin went over a couple more times, and Bater went once more as well. I would have gone again, but climbing back up was no bueno.

Once everyone had had their fill of rappelling, snacks and some beer, it was time to head back. Going down the hill was almost as much fun as rappelling, in that a few of us decided to scooch down on our tushes as it was quite steep and we didn’t want to tumble. The hares were nice and didn’t make us bushwhack our way back, but let us take the walking path with the rickety bridge to get to the parking lot where we had circle. They ferried us the mile or so back to our cars and another SHITTY trail was done with.

-Immaculate Projection