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All posts for the month March, 2017

Wetlands, indeed

P-I-S-S-I-N’ on your tra-a-il…Pissy trail, it sucked. Pissy trail, it blew…etc.

Started at Lineage on a nice enough day, too bad it went downhill after that. The pack blew past a beer near (some say it was sabotage) and found the cemetery booze, along with tasty snacks. Cemeteries are becoming a thing it seems…

Thence on to the aforementioned pissing spot for another beer near, because renegade. And after that, a relocated beer near because of the missed one. Score one for laying dead trails!

On in was somehow shittier than the trail itself, since our RA was the hare, then drunken hashers were set loose upon Columbus.

What better way to honor the wartime death of hashing’s founder than to get drunk in a cemetery for the insane, right? Right?!?!?

That was the original plan, anyway. Then your humble author and my capable co-hare PUMPS TIL IT BURNS decided to lay trail live, even though one of us is lazier than a pet coon. It was then the plan was hatched…a gummi heart, made out of red wine and vodka, that everyone could eat…in the cemetery.

Everyone met at Sideswipe Brewing for a hearty prelube, then the hares were off. As for the trail, I can’t tell you a thing…I suppose it was perfectly laid and the rainbows we planted at every check sprouted right on time to greet the pack. All I know is some people seemingly gave birth on trail, because not only did they take forever in getting to the cemetery, there were three fully grown men that weren’t there when the hares took off.

Whatever, we entertained all cummers and h*aded to on-in, where pizza was delivered right as circle started. Have I mentioned the hares for this particular trail are fucking geniuses? Circle itself was the usual shitshow, naming people for no good reason and whatnot. I’m not sure anyone even remembers some of the names we gave out.

WHO: Renegade Hash House Harriers Columbus
WHAT: Trail #071
WHEN: March 24, 2017
WHERE: Old North Arcade, 2591 N. High St., Columbus OH 43202
HARES: Nice Try and Itchy Bitsy
MUSTER: 6:00
CHALK TALK: 7:00
ON-OUT: 7:15
TRAIL: A to A’
SHIGGY: 3ish
HASH CASH: $7
FAMILY AND DOG FRIENDLY: NO
BRING: Fleshlight and extra shoes

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WHO: Renegade Hash House Harriers Columbus
WHAT: Trail #072
WHEN: April 1, 2017
WHERE: Hamilton’s Pub, 4866 Thompson Rd., Columbus OH 43230
HARES: So Many Ways, Dangerous Dismount, and Battery Operated Boyfriend
MUSTER: 3:30
CHALK TALK: 4:30
ON-OUT: 4:45
TRAIL: A to A
SHIGGY: 3
HASH CASH: $7
FAMILY AND DOG FRIENDLY: tba
BRING: tba

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03/13/17 Flight #43

Who: Renegade Hash House Harriers and friends
What: Renegade Brewery Tour Flight #43
When: March 13, 2017
Where: Betty’s Bar, 435 W. Nationwide Blvd., Columbus OH 43215
Muster: 5pm
Why: We are “a drinking club with a running problem

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WHO: Renegade Hash House Harriers Columbus
WHAT: Green Dress Run and trail #070 aka “#069.69”
WHEN: March 18, 2017
WHERE: Martinos Sports Bar And Grille, 6645 Dublin Center Drive, Dublin, Ohio
HARES: Can’t Feel It’s VIRGIN LAY with Leggo My Preggo
MUSTER: 3:00
CHALK TALK: 4:00
ON-OUT: 4:15
TRAIL: A to A’ish
SHIGGY: 3
HASH CASH: $7
FAMILY AND DOG FRIENDLY: NO ( unless they are disguised as leprechauns)
BRING: tba

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